


Let my prayers be answered

by Treasure7



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Eventual Smut, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Series Spoilers, Slow Build Gabriel/Sam Winchester, destiel-relationship, sabriel-relationship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-17
Updated: 2015-12-10
Packaged: 2018-04-04 22:05:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,253
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4154697
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Treasure7/pseuds/Treasure7
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What if Gabriel did "die" at the Elyssian Hotel, only when you die as an angel you don't go to heaven or hell? What if instead you reside in this unexisting place where you are not dead but not exactly alive either? And what if a very strong prayer, where the wish for you to actually be right next to the person praying is so strong (because it's made with you heart and soul combined) it can actually bring the angel back?<br/>What if, when everything turns to shit and his brother is struggling with staying human, Gabriel is the one person/Angel Sam wishes was there to help him through it? And sometimes, wishes do come true...</p><p>OBS: The rating is for later chapters (both smut and violence)!<br/>This story is set after s10e22 (and will contain spoilers if you haven't seen up until that episode, however after that episode I'm going a bit off script and creating my own little story)<br/>The story will center around Gabriel/Sam (Sabriel) but there will be some Destiel in there as well. It's partly slow-built and the summary sounds a bit more unclear than I'd like, but I suck at writing summaries so... I hope you get the gist anyway!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone!  
> This is my first Sabriel-fic and I would pretty much just like to say: I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it!  
> Also: If anyone feels compelled to do some artwork to suit my writing, please be my guest (I can't draw to save my life so...) and I would love to see it! I'm also new to this whole tagging-thing so if you have any tags that you think I should post on this one, please let me know in the comments. Now,enjoy!

Sam had had enough. Dean telling him that Sam should be the body they were burning and not Charlie had been the last straw. That had been the moment he had realized that the mark really was taking over his brother. The Dean he knew would never tell him something like that, no matter how angry he got. And then, when Cas came to him bloody and explaining how Dean had threatened him to but out and leave him be, he just sighed and let the frustrating tears that had been threatening for months finally fall. So yes, Sam had had enough of things never working out for them, for everything turning to shit. Loosing Charlie had been a low blow from the universe and now here he was, on his knees in his bed and praying to a dead angel. Because even though he knew nobody would probably hear him, it still felt good to let his frustrations out on someone.

 

“Gabriel. Gabe. I honestly don't even know why on earth I chose you of all the dead angels. I guess it's because even though you were mostly just an ass when you actually were alive, you did die to help us in the end and... well I never actually thanked you for being the one good surprise in our lives. Thank you. God, you must be so happy you're not around to see how fucked up things have gotten since then though. Oh sorry for taking your fathers name in vain. No, you know what? I am not fucking sorry because that asshole is the reason we're in this mess to begin with. He was the one who created all of this after all and I just... I don't get what any of the people around me, your brother included, ever did to deserve this, you know?” , Sam hid his face in his hands and groaned in frustration. A pretty huge part of him, for some reason he really didn't feel like looking into any closer, wished Gabriel was there with him right now and could do something, anything, to make him feel better or to help them. He _had_ been an archangel after all. He shook his head in disbelief, because he knew that the reason he wanted Gabriel there with him had very little to do with him being able to help and more to do with the fact that Sam actually missed the other man, even if he tended to be the most infuriating creature in this dimension. Even if he'd never actually had a real meaningful conversation with the angel that didn't include one or two insults or threats, Sam had always felt a small connection and respect towards him.

“I wish you were here though. I know we didn't exactly get along and that you pretty much despised me. I mean us, Dean and I. But I, we, could really use one more good guy on our side. And then there's this whole thing with Dean and Cas. I mean you know that there's more than just friendship between those two and I just... Well I can't stand one more of Cas' kicked puppy-looks whenever Dean gives him shit about caring for him. I'm just worried you know. I'm worried that maybe we won't be able to save Dean from what the mark is doing to him, maybe we won't be able to get Rowena to help us translate the cure for the Mark of Cain. I don't know. Dammit why did you have to fucking die Gabe!? I never would have told you this if you could actually hear me, but you would have been useful you know. You _were_ an archangel after all and I assume that comes with a lot of knowledge, knowledge I would have loved to make use of. Maybe you could have even helped us read the book of the damned. I'm sounding like I just want you here so that I can use you, which I guess is kind of true but I want you to know that I really do believe that we could have become friends at some point, if you'd chosen to fight with us.”

He shook his head and, speaking to himself, he finished:

“I can't believe I'm doing this, rambling on to a dead archangel who was pretty much a douche when alive anyway. I'm losing my mind”.

 

***

 

Gabriel was bored. Being dead was boring. It was an endless nothingness and he didn't even have anyone to talk to. He only had himself and the great big nothing. He didn't know how long he'd resided in this godforsaken place when he heard the voice, and he could have kissed the boy if he would have been able to, just for relieving him of the quiet. At first he didn't feel it, because of the euphoria he was currently in, but when he calmed down enough to actually listen he felt the power that came with the words. The man on the other side was, most likely unknowingly, giving him back some of his power. He was sharing a part of his soul, which was slowing starting to knit together Gabriels' grace from where it had torn with his death. He wished he could reach out to Sam and tell him what his prayer was doing and to ask him to please continue, and he would do whatever he could to help him if he ever got back. But he couldn't, his grace was too shattered to attempt even the smallest communication. All he could do was sit back and listen to the hunter, to the strong man who he'd somehow founded a weird but great affection for and who was currently telling him how he wished he was there with him. When Sam changed the subject to his little brother and Dean, Gabriel couldn't help but smile. Yes, he'd seen the attraction between the two, and the frustration of not understanding why they felt what they felt for each other. At least this was something he was able to do while he hoped for another strengthening prayer from Sam, helping his brother get laid was something he'd love to do. Cassie had always been a bit uptight, maybe getting himself some hot ass would help loosening him up some. Or ,you know, getting something other than that stick currently residing there up his ass, preferably a dick belonging to a certain hunter or his dick up the hunters' ass. Gabriel didn't judge, whatever floats your boat and all that.

But yes, he could definitely make a plan of how to get his little brother laid. And, if he was being honest with himself, he wouldn't mind terribly to spend some time with Sam while their brothers got their shit together.

 

He smiled a little at Sams' finishing words.

“Please let this not be your last prayer to me, kid” he said out into the nothingness. He knew Sam couldn't hear him, but it still felt nice to actually talk to someone other than himself after all this time in this place.

 

Gabriel knew now what happened to angels when they died, they simply ceased to exist and went into this nothingness where he was now. As they didn't have a soul, they couldn't go to heaven or hell and this nothingness it was. He also knew that they were supposed to let go of their life and drift away into oblivion, but he wasn't like other angels. Gabriels' life had been far too exciting to simply let it go, there were still so many things he wanted to do and say. Gabriel had refused to let go of life for so long that he didn't know if he even could anymore. Not that existing in this place, if you could even call it that, was better exactly. It was just that he felt unfinished somehow, like it just hadn't been his time to die yet and that there was more to his part of the story.

 

Turns out he was right. 'Cause if things worked out like he thought, or rather _hoped_ that they would, then he'd get a second chance at life. He almost jumped in place at the thought. Except he wasn't exactly standing or sitting, he was just kind of floating around, so he settled with grinning really wide at the thought instead.

 

***  
  
Sam laid back in his bed, tired after a few really long days. Hunting without Dean sucked, and caught him in more deadly situations than he'd like to admit. After his little murder-spree, and his fight with Cas, Dean had been almost as bad as when he'd been a Demon and they'd been forced to lock him in, under the pretense they needed his help with research. Dean knew that it wasn't true, of course he knew. He wasn't stupid, but he didn't say anything except when an episode hit and he started trowing around names and accusations. After he'd taken to making it his personal mission to make sure Cas left them for good, which Sam thought was mostly 'cause he felt he didn't deserve the angel as a friend and most definitely not as more than that, by calling him things like “a weak pussy” or telling him things like “fucking pathetic no-good loser who can't get anything right, why would anyone ever follow you?” Sam had told Cas to go work on getting Rowena to translate the cure for the Mark, assuring him once again that nothing Dean said during his rage-fits was what he actually meant when he saw how his brothers' words where affecting the angel.

 

He missed his brother, the man he used to be. He missed discussing a case with him, being good-naturedly teased about his “rabbit food”. He even missed Deans' endless craving for pie, which had disappeared the more the Mark got hold of him. He missed having someone to talk to about his troubles and worries, since Cas wasn't really around much and he didn't want to freak the angel out more than necessary. So he went to talk to the one person who he felt he could talk to right now, even if he was fairly certain no one was able to listen.

 

“Hi Gabe, how's death treating you these days? I bet if there's a heaven for angels, yours is filled with candy, candy and some more candy. Maybe a sucker or two who you can screw with as well.”

He smiled at the image.

“ I had quite a close call today, so maybe I'll join you sooner than planned. I can't leave Dean though, not like this. He's becoming worse and I've had to separate him and Cas, since he was hurting him. Not physically I mean, your brother is fine don't worry. But he was saying some things that he didn't mean and I could see how Cas wasn't really doing as well as he pretended he was, so I sent him to focus on convincing Rowena. I think he might have come up with a deal, he sounded quite excited about something last time I spoke to him, you know.”

He sighed and let his mind travel back to the hunt he just got back from with a shudder going through him.

“It was a vampire, the close call I mean. Not _a_ vampire, per say, but a nest of them. I went after them cause I needed an easy case, you know, to focus on something not related to Dean or how much my life sucks for once. But there were more of those assholes than I initially thought, sneaky bastards too, and turned out I was in way over my head. I wont bore you with the story, but the gist of it is I was cornered and was pretty convinced that I was about to become dinner. But then one of them jumped me and as I ducked and sliced his head of, I saw this door to one of the bathrooms and I just ran towards it and locked me in. I'm not gonna lie and say that the thought even crossed my mind until I was in there, I just knew I needed a second or two to come up with a plan to get the fuck out of there in one piece. Anyway, so their nest was in an old school, you know where they have these tiles in the roof that you can lift up? Above the tiles are almost always plumbing that leads to all the other rooms in the building. So, since they were about to break the door to the bathroom in on me I got up there to hide while I waited. I don't know what it is about vampires, but they really aren't the sharpest knives in the shed. Like really not. After a while, when they assumed I got out somehow and started spreading out to find me, I started to kill them off one by one by going the roof-way. Long story short, I eventually managed to kill them all and I'm never going after a nest on my own ever again, I'm not _that_ suicidal.”

Sam hid his face in his hands and screamed out in frustration.

“I just hate feeling like this, you know. Useless and... well alone. I mean I'm speaking to a dead Archangel, something is obviously wrong with me here. And then, maybe you aren't even really dead. Cas did see you that one time, even if it was an illusion. God dammit! Now here I am, thinking you're actually alive, and just ignoring me”

And wow, did that thought hurt more than it was supposed to. Sam decided to just drop it and stood up to go to the shower and rinse of all the gore from the hunt. It wasn't until he crawled back under the sheets that he felt more than heard it, a small part of him that was asking him to not give up on the angel just yet. He hid his face in the pillow and let sleep claim him, tomorrow he would have to check in with Cas and get back to the Mark of Cain-issue at hand.

 

***  
  
I had been almost a week since Sams' last prayer and Gabriel had begun to loose hope. He couldn't really blame the hunter for not praying to him again though. For one, Sam thought he was dead and even if he didn't, it's not like he had treated the boys in any way that warranted either of them wishing to speak with him again. Still, Gabriel couldn't help but wish that he could have had that second chance to not be a coward for once, to make up for all the things he put them through.

He sighed and spoke to the nothingness:

“I get it Sammish, but man do I wish I could have been there to help you right now, if only to translate that damn spell for the Mark of Cain. I'm good at that kind of stuff you know, figuring old languages out. I'm pretty sure I could have figured out how to translate it for you. I get it though, why you're not praying to me again....”

 

Just as he was about to just go back to feeling really sorry for himself he heard it again. And it was as if his whole body lit up with happiness. Sam was praying again. Sam was wishing for him to be there with him. Then, when he listened to the words the hunter was saying, Gabriel panicked a little.

“Oh no no no no Sam, don't you dare say things like 'maybe I'll join you sooner than planned', don't you say that! Fuck, I just wish I could tell you that I'm here, that I'm listening and I just really need you not to give up on me just yet okay? Just keep on telling me your troubles and as soon as I get enough of my strength back to come back to you, I will help. I promise I'll do everything I can to help you. I promise I'll make up for all our other encounters. Just please, _please_ don't give up on me”

He was hyperventilating at the end, panicking at the thought of Sam dead. He couldn't even explain why he was so riled up about it, he just was. The thought made him sick.

And whoa? How did that even happen? When did he start caring so much about the hunter that the mere thought about the other man dead made him want to crawl up into himself and just cry his heart out? Was it just because his voice was the only thing keeping him sane in this place, which he expected was designed to drive him mad with boredom? That could be it, actually.

“Yes”, he said to himself, “That must be it. I'm just reluctant to go insane and to thank him I'll help him and our brothers. Yes, that's it”. Gabriel nodded to himself a few times, proud of this conclusion. Although, he would help Castiel wether he was grateful to Sam or not. He loved his brother and if being with the surly hunter would make him happy, then Gabriel would make sure that's what he got. If he could also have a little fun on his own, well... that was just an added bonus, wasn't it?

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry about the delay. I think I re-wrote this chapter about 10 times before I just decided to go with this direction. I'm sorry it isn't as long as the last one, but I just kind of felt like it was the perfect place to end the chapter at so I put the rest of it into the still unfinished chapter 3. I promise I will make sure the next update will be getting to you faster than this one.
> 
> I would also like for you all to remember that despite some things happening in this chapter, this is a slow burn fic and there will not be any clear relationship between our two boys for at least another chapter or two (maybe three, I don't know). There will be hints though, because I find that to be the best part of a fic.
> 
> On a completely other note, my friend and I are going to Vancon in about a week too meet the cast and having a blast, and I just wanted to know if anyone else is going to be there? If so, let me know in the comments.
> 
> Anyway, enjoy!

**Chapter 2**

Staring out on the field in front of him, Sam knew it was a dream. Not because of the strange field, the fact that the grass somehow created some sort of a path for him to walk or because the birds seemed to be singing to him to keep going forward (which was just weird in itself, but Sam had a weird mind so that didn't really bother him). No, it was the fact the it was so calm and, aside from the birds, quiet. Real life had never felt this nice.

When he lifted his foot to take a step forward, he could make out a shadow of someone standing a few yards ahead. Curious as to who it might be, Sam walked faster towards the shape.

“Hello?”, he called out, trying to figure out who it was, but he got no answer. Instead, whoever it was just continued to watch him, waiting for him to come closer. Instead of saying anything else, Sam started to run towards the other person, afraid they might disappear if he didn't hurry.

 

As he got closer, he could finally make out who the person was. Considering how much time he'd spent thinking about the man lately, he really shouldn't have been surprised that his unconscious had summoned this picture.

“Gabriel?” he said, unable to hide the slight hinge of hope in his tone. Now that he could see him properly, Sam saw that Gabriel wasn't actually looking at him, but rather through him. It was as if he couldn't even see him. Sam frowned, wondering what the hell this was supposed to mean. If every dream had a deeper meaning, then he had no idea what this one meant. He looked around, to see if there was anything else that might give him a clue as to where the hell he was, or what this was supposed to mean.

“You know, I kind of figured you would want to punish me for trying to kill my brother, but this. This is a bit extreme, don't you think? I'll admit though, it's a damn good punishment”

Sam's eyes shot back to the angel as he began speaking, thinking he might be trying to tell him something. But the other man was still looking right through him, as if he wasn't even on the same plane as Sam.

“What do you mean punishment? Who's punishing you?” he tried, thinking maybe his words might get through to Gabriel, even if his physical form obviously didn't.

“I know what your game is, you know. You're trying to drive me mad. Trying to make me believe that I am all alone. That nobody wants or need me anymore. That I'm nothing. That, even before I got here, and if I were to ever get out, I was and would be all alone. You are right in the sense that I was alone. You're wrong in the sense that nobody needs me and that I would be alone, were I ever to get the fuck out of this hellhole.”

Who was he talking to? Sam looked around once more to see if maybe someone had appeared since last he checked. But nothing. He frowned and looked back at Gabriel, as he continued his rant.

“Some time ago, this little game of yours might have worked and I would be standing here, begging you to just end my existence completely. But he prayed. I thought he hated me, he would have every right to, but then he prayed and without even knowing it, he started bringing me back. He gave me hope. Not even you can beat the desperate desire of a human soul, father. Nothing is as strong as that. You and I both know that. He just has to keep praying, and one of these days I will get out of this place and back to him. And when I do, I am going to do anything and everything in my power to deserve the faith that that man put in me. You hear me? I will not let you beat me. I will not let you make me loose my mind, because there is still someone down there who needs me. I may be a little late on the membership-fee for their little club, unlike my darling brother, but damnit I will make sure I deserve the faith of Sam Winchester!”

Sam could only stare at him, shocked at the words coming out of the Angels' mouth. His prayer actually reached him? Gabriel wasn't dead, just trapped in some weird universe built to drive him mad with loneliness? What the actual fuck? He was just about to voice his questions and demand an explanation as to what the hell was going on, when he was woken up by his alarm. He groaned as he rolled out of bed and put his head in his hands.

“Well, I guess there's only one way to find out if all of this really is working or if my mind is just as messed up as I think it is”, he grumbled and closed his eyes for a prayer.

“Ugh, I feel ridiculous”

***

Gabriel was screaming at his father again. He had been doing that for quite some time now, trying to get the bastard to materialize. If he put him here, then he could damn well get his ass down here and explain himself. Granted, the past few centuries Gabriel hadn't exactly been the son of the year. But before he left, before Lucifer and Michael started their fighting and Lucifer had himself thrown in a cage. Before he'd gotten too tired of all the hate his brothers, who used to love each other, now seemed to have. Before all that, Gabriel had been a really good one. In fact, he'd been a fantastic son. He'd obeyed every order, made sure his fathers' new children received Gods' words and rules, and he'd even helped slay the children that were unworthy. He'd done all of this without a second thought, without asking for an explanation.

Was it really so strange that he didn't want to see his beloved brothers fight? Was it really so wrong of him to not wish to see his other brothers and sisters choose the side of either brother, and then watch as his family slowly fell apart?

No, Gabriel couldn't say he felt that him leaving was the same as being a bad son. He'd loved his family. He'd loved God. But his family obviously hadn't loved him back. His family had somewhere along the way lost the ability to love, lost the knowledge of how important love was for survival.

 

When he'd seen the way Castiel was cast aside as a traitor because he felt love and dared to think for himself, he'd been furious. At first he thought that it would all stop if the big fight between Michael and Lucifer finally took place, that the world and his family would go back to being at peace no matter who won. But after he'd watched the Winchester-brothers for a while, he'd known that having the fight between his brothers go forward wouldn't solve anything. So, he'd done what he'd always done before everything went to shit; He'd asked himself what his father would want him to do. That's how he'd come up with the solution to try and stop Lucifer, which just ended up getting himself killed.

Still though, his last move _had_ been in the interest of being a good son to his father and protecting humanity, so he was pretty pissed of that he was now being punished despite that.

 

“Um, Gabe? Can you hear me?”

Sam! Sam was praying to him again. Gabriel had missed that voice so much. It was the only thing keeping him from losing his mind in this place, and each time the other man prayed to him he could feel some of his grace returning to him. Soon he might be able to interact with the hunter and if nothing else, bitch him out for even thinking about giving up and giving him a huge scare by not praying for what felt like forever.

”Lord, this feels stupid but here goes nothing:

This is a bit awkward for me, since I didn't actually think anyone was listening to my prayers before. Then I had this really weird dream where you were sort of screaming at someone about them trying to make you go mad but my prayers would keep you from that? I don't know if it was just some wierdo dream or if it was an actual message telling me that there is a way for you to know back to me, us I mean us. Cas, Dean and me. I have to say, it would be nice to talk to someone who wasn't half out of his mind from a damn mark on his arm, or someone who wasn't freaking out and looking like a kicked puppy over said man with the mark on his arm...

I know we've had our differences, and I guess I should kind of hate you. But I don't know... I just feel like since you died for us, for humanity, it should earn you some forgiveness for being a complete for the entirety of the time I've known you.

Anyway. I'm still not sure if I'm going crazy or if you're actually listening to this, so if you could maybe give me some sort of sign that you're there or something I would really appreciate it, okay?”

 

Gabriel smiled sadly at the words, boy did he wish he could send a sign down to Sam. He had no idea how the other man had managed to get that dream, but he sure wasn't complaining about it.

 

Almost a minute after the prayer had ended, and just as he was in his deepest thoughts of how much power it would actually take him to get inside of Sammy's head to place a message saying that he was in fact listening, he felt a new power-surge inside of him. It was as if his grace was waking up and taking a hold inside of him. As if he'd been given a new mission and thus a new chance at life.

He was still a bit too weak to move. But if he focused enough of his energy, he might just be able to get inside of the hunter's brain. He wouldn't be able to change the dream he was having though, so he'd just have to work with what was there.

 

There was no way Gabriel could have prepared himself or what he saw in that head though, and it really shouldn't have hurt him as much as it did.

 

What was wrong with him? Why was Sam standing in a small kitchen, with his hands around some dark-haired woman making him want to throw up or at least bash the girls' head in a little bit? Well, whatever it was, he didn't have time to dwell on it now. He had a message to deliver and not a lot of time to do it. Clearing his throat awkwardly ha began:

 

“Sam?”, the other man looked up and locked eyes with him.

“Gabe? Is that you?”, the smile that lit up his face really should make Gabriel as happy as it did. But then he looked back towards the woman still in Sam's arms and he decided to just get this over with so he could rid himself of the pain that image caused.

“Yeah, it's me. Sorry to burst your party but I'm sort of ow on juice and couldn't change the dream for you. I'm actually here because you asked me for a sign that I can hear you. I can. Right now I'm not strong enough to get back and help you guys, but I have a feeling that I will be pretty soon”, he cleared his throat awkwardly again and went to disappear from the dream again, message delivered, when Sam's voice broke the silence that had settled:

“Hey!” , as he turned around he saw Sam rounding the table and walking towards him. Before he could react, the other man had his hand under the angels' head and was leaning down. When their lips connected all sense of pain vanished from inside of him. It was as if Sam healed him with just that small gesture.

 

It was over far too soon though, and unfortunately so was Gabriel's power that kept him in the dream. When he opened his eyes again, he only had a second to see Sam's face, shocked over what he'd just done, before he was back in what he had now dubbed his personal little hell-hole.

 

What in the world did just happen? Maybe Sam thought it be just a dream? It certainly didn't seem like it was something he'd planned on doing, judging by his face. Fuck, why did the kid have to be damn impulsive? That was supposed to be Deans' move, not Sam's. Keep to your own damn personality and stop confusing an old archangel. Didn't he understand that a confused angel was a distracted angel, and Gabriel didn't get distracted so something was obviously wrong here. He just had to figure out what it was and how to fix it...

 


	3. Not a new chapter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! I just wanted to let you all know that I've re-read this fic and though I am still very attached to the story, I am not really happy with the writing of it. Therefore I will be deleting this within a week to re-write it. I'm sorry if this disappoints some of you, but I find myself unable to continue with it as it is now.
> 
> If you want to know when the new fic is being posted, you can either follow me here, or you can follow me on tumblr at: PrincessOfSabriel . 
> 
> Thank you so much for reading this and I'll have the new version out for you as soon as possible. You reading this means the world to me!

Hi everyone! I just wanted to let you all know that I've re-read this fic and though I am still very attached to the story, I am not really happy with the writing of it. Therefore I will be deleting this within a week to re-write it. I'm sorry if this disappoints some of you, but I find myself unable to continue with it as it is now.

 

If you want to know when the new fic is being posted, you can either follow me here, or you can follow me on tumblr at: PrincessOfSabriel .


End file.
